Category Archives: Parenting

Parenting research and personal anecdotes.

Busy September

September has been very busy. We started out with a Megafest over Labor Day weekend. I think this is probably the best one yet with Calvin. We got a babysitter for 4 hrs two of the days and for the last two days he was in daycare for the full day. This left Saturday as the only day for which we were trying to fest and entertain Calvin at the same time. It worked out reasonably well by me taking him to church for the first half and meeting up with the others on Pearl street and letting Calvin wander.

While I’m still sad that Borders is going out of business, that hasn’t stopped me from going and looking for bargains. To my surprise, I found quite a few that I hadn’t read from authors that I have enjoyed in the past. I’m looking forward to a chance to read them.

Toward the beginning of September I started going to a Tai Chi class at the rec center. I checked out a DVD of Tai Chi many years ago and, while I liked the concept, it was obvious this wasn’t something I was going to be able to pick up from a video. I was looking over the rec center guide because I was interested in getting Calvin enrolled in swimming classes and saw this Tai Chi class. It fit into my schedule so I decided to give it a shot. It’s a drop in class so everyone is at different levels. Fortunately, a whole bunch of new people showed up the same day I did so the teacher decided to start at the beginning. It’s pretty slow going. Reminds me a lot of learning the piano. At the begining you’re awful and change happens so gradually it almost isn’t noticeable. However, I knew it wasn’t going to be simple and it is interesting.

Jaeger’s mom visited us this week. She arrived on Sunday and just left this morning. She and Calvin had great fun amusing each other. We also celebrated Jaeger and my birthday (since she was in person, she wanted to do both at the same time). We had mini-German chocolate cakes that were very fun. Jaeger’s mom also gave me a duvet comforter which I’ve been wanting for almost a year. It’s white with a grey pattern and I think it lightens up our room more than our blue duvet cover does.

I did manage to find a swimming class for Calvin. In addition, I found a “tumbling” class for him. Each is only once a week so it’s not too overwhelming.

We went to his first Tumbling class on Monday. I wasn’t sure what to expect. The class was held in a medium-sized classroom. There was all sorts of equipment scattered around such as a trampoline, balance beam, mats, etc. They started with 10 minutes of “free time” where the kids got to explore everything. Then we did a warm-up. Calvin seemed to know exactly what he was doing even though this was his first class. Daycare must have them do some of this stuff or something. He’s not learning it at home . . . After the warm-up, she demostrated a little routine that she wanted them to all go through. When she first demonstrated I didn’t believe that the kids could do everything but Calvin proved I was wrong. It was chaos but controlled chaos. Calvin had a lot of fun and we got back home later than I was planning.

The next evening was swimming lessons. It turns out that Calvin is a little fish. He was fighting my hold on him most of the time trying to get me to let go. Given we were in 3′ deep water, I didn’t. He enthusastically splashed and paddled and threw a fit when it was time to get out. I think I’m going to buy him a pass and come early on swimming days and also go to the pool another day a week. At least, I’ll try that schedule out and see if it works. Calvin was also fascinated by the group showers. I turned the shower on and expected him to object since he doesn’t like them at home. However, he didn’t complain and started experimenting with how far out he could get before he no longer got wet. Then he’d back up until the shower was spraying the top of his head.

Jaeger’s mom babysat Calvin after the pool and I met Jaeger in Boulder where we went to eat and then wandered into the Boulder Bookstore where we bought even more books.

Calvin Moments from Today:

  • We went to the library today and one of the books Calvin wanted me to read was ABC Kids by Simon Basher. It’s a cute ABC book where there is a child, whose name starts with the first letter of the featured alphabet letter for that page, that sits on top of the letter. When we got to the letter C, Calvin said, “you get off letter! My letter!!” I didn’t even bother telling him that it wasn’t a real person. I just told him we needed to share the letter. He was not impressed by this logic. (To see the picture he objected to, go to the Amazon link then click Search inside this book. After that, in the “Search Inside This Book” search box, type Claude.)

  • On the way back to our house, Calvin announced from his car seat that he wanted to go home. I told him that we were going home. He then said, “Step on the gas mommy!” I was incredulious that I had heard correctly so I carefully asked if he wanted me to go faster and he concurred. It’s not a phrase that I’ve used in his presence but Jaeger informs me that he probably picked it up from Cars and Trucks and Things that Go where it says, “Step on the gas, Bunny Rabbit!”

  • Today at supper Calvin eyed my glass and then said, “May I have some water.” This astonished me for a couple of reasons. First, it’s a complete sentence with no words missing. Second, he properly used the word “may” instead of “can.”

September is going to continue to be busy. I play for Sabbath School tomorrow and then have practice at someone’s house later in the afternoon. I play for church the following week and Bethany and Josh will be here for Bethany’s reunion. Then the week after that, my mother arrives to get her Calvin fix.

Grocery Store Changes

Last week I had almost finished an update when my computer suddenly died. Of course, I had not been saving my epic entry. Jaeger helpfully pointed out that if I had been using a smart text editor, something would have saved anyway. However, while I like Vim for some things, copying and pasting into a browser is not one of them. Jaeger suggested I should try gVim for this purpose so we’ll see how well it works . . . Below is a quick recap of what I had typed last week as well as my new up/downs.

Our King Soopers store has been adding NuVal to many items. Their rating system doesn’t really match my own personal rating system. For instance, a product can get a pretty high rating for being low in sugar even if this is entirely due to artificial sweetners being used. I’m more of a whole foods type person. I’d much rather buy full-fat, full-sugar ice cream and eat a small portion than eat a larger amount of no-sugar, no-fat ice cream.

However, I was fascinated to discover that even though I don’t really believe in the system, it still influences my buying decisions. I buy a package of individually wrapped Dove Dark Chocolate pieces every week. I’ve discovered that if I don’t have something sweet within the house when I’m craving sugar, I will instead make brownies and eat half the pan the same night. Not a good idea. Instead, I compromise by allowing myself several pieces of Dove chocolate every day. I usually get the dark chocolate variety but two weeks ago I was contemplating getting milk chocolate. Then I saw that it had a slightly lower NuVal number than the dark chocolate. I couldn’t make myself by the milk chocolate variety. Same thing happened last week. I was reaching for the milk chocolate and got stopped by seeing the NuVal number. It’s really odd since I haven’t been impressed with the rating system so you wouldn’t think a number it assigns would stop me from buying something.

In other grocery story news, I was taught that, in general, buying larger amounts of items tended to mean you paid less per ounce for it. For instance, a gallon of milk tends to cost less per cup than a half-gallon of milk. However, I’ve noticed that this is less likely too be true these days. Quite a few times within the last month I’ve picked up the larger size without thinking and then just do a quick sanity check on the price per oz and discover that I’m better off buying two of the small sizes. This has been true for frozen orange juice, oil, and shampoo. I’m wondering if this has been going on for a long amount of time or if it’s a new trend in grocery stores. I’m use to a smaller size being a better deal when it’s on sale but in all of the cases mentioned above, I was comparing non-sale prices.

Down

  • Calvin stayed up later than normal for a couple of nights last week. He refused to stay in his bed and instead would bring out a book and quietly flip through it at the top of the stairs. On one hand, I can remember reading after I was suppose to be in bed when I was a child. However, he obviously isn’t getting enough sleep when he does this which is disastrous for the following morning. Also, the only way to get him to sleep like this is for me to go and fall asleep next to him in his room. Then, when I wake up, I sneak back to my own bed. It’s not very restful.

  • I lost my cell phone about a week ago. Somehow in the five minutes between checking the time on it to actually leaving the park, I managed to lose it. It hasn’t turned up. Several days ago I gave up and ordered a new unlocked phone. I took it into T-Mobile and was impressed by how painless they made it to transfer my existing prepaid account to the new phone. I think I actually prefer the new phone but I would rather have not spent the money for a new phone.

Ups

  • Calvin and Jaeger went to an airshow today which left me alone. I used the time to make a trip to Costco, where I spent too much money, and then cleaned out the fridge in anticipation of our next Fest.

  • I’ve had quite a few good books to read recently. I loved Ghost Ship, the newest Sharon Lee and Steve Miller Liaden book. I also enjoyed A Lady’s Lesson in Scandal, by Meredith Duran, Hounded, by Kevin Hearne, and Heart Search, by Robin Owens. Currently, I’m re-listening to Welcome to Temptation by Jennifer Crusie. A couple of weeks ago I had been listening to Faking It which reference characters in Welcome to Temptation and made me want to re-visit the first story :-) Not sure what physical book I’m going to read next but I’m queuing up Visions in Death, by J.D. Robb, as my next audio book. I love Robb’s Eve Dallas series but I have to take breaks between each book before I can listen to the next one.

  • It turns out that I had maligned Calvin when I claimed he lost my iPod. It had fallen into a box while I was cleaning the basement last December. I just found it. Since I already bought a new iPod that I like, I’ve decided to give this one to Calvin. That is, I’m loading it with “Calvin Music” and playing it in the car when he’s with me.

Calvin Moment
Calvin seems to be getting more into books recently. I checked out a copy of Richard Scary’s Best Storybook Ever from the library about a month ago. It’s not really my preferred type of book for Calvin. To be frank, I find the book to be a bit mediocre. The illustrations don’t speak to me and the stories are extremely simplistic. However, Calvin loves it. He’s spent up to a half-hour at a time flipping through those pages which, for a toddler, is incredible. So, when I stumbled across a used copy at The Boulder Bookworm, I immediately snapped it up. At this point, having Calvin enjoy the concept of books is much more important than nitpicking about quality.

Calvin is also becoming more involved in book selection at the library. When we visit, I’ll sit down at a couch in the children’s area and Calvin will scamper off to a book bin and pick out a book for me to read to him. Once we’re finished, he’ll scamper off to find another book. He still plays with the toys in the library some but obviously is becoming more interested in the books themselves.

Well, it turns out that Calvin is refusing to go to sleep again tonight. So, I must head upstairs to fall asleep on his floor as an example . . .

Upset, Yet Amusing, Calvin Moments

I may have mentioned that Calvin is a very intense child. When he’s happy, he’s very happy. When he’s sad, he’s very sad. I have two incidents today to relate that I find amusing but probably shouldn’t.

We are getting a table, 8 chairs, and a sofa today. This is furniture we ordered a couple of months ago so I’ll be very excited to see how it looks in our home. Originally, I was hoping that our current sofa could be moved to the basement. However, the sofa appears too big to navigate around the corner. So, we posted an ad on Craigslist saying it was free for anyone who wanted to pick it up. However, we did this yesterday night so it’s still here. As a result, we needed to move it so there would be room for the new sofa. This morning, before Jaeger left for work, we took either side of the couch with the intent of moving it so it’d be flush against the entertainment center. Calvin threw a fit. Apparently he really didn’t like the idea of the sofa moving. He ran over screaming, “No mommy! No!” and then braced himself against the other side of the couch and tried his best to move it, by himself, back into the position had been. Both Jaeger and I had to hide our faces to keep from laughing. It was just so ludicrous looking seeing a little toddler trying to move a heavy sofa by himself. We eventually compromised by giving Calvin “a ride” on the sofa while we moved it.

This afternoon when I arrived at daycare, Calvin was still sleeping. His teacher informed me that he hadn’t gone to sleep until 2pm so I decided to let him nap till 3pm. (I had to wake him up after that because the furniture delivery is suppose to happen between 3-5pm). Calvin was not happy when I woke him up. He was even unhappier when we got home and I took him out of his car seat. He kept insisting that he wanted to stay in the car seat but it’s hot outside. On the way inside, he threw his little duplo train against the steps and some of the blocks came apart. I continued into the house holding the screaming toddler. Once inside he sat there and cried and cried and finally went back and opened the garage door and went into the garage. I followed him and picked up the duplo train that was lying on the stairs. I put it back together and temporarily left Calvin in the garage by himself to put the duplo train with the rest of his duplos. Calvin was incensed, “No! Mommy! No!!!!!” He ran inside, found the duplo train, opened the garage door again and then threw it against the steps. We repeated this twice more. I have no idea why it was important that the duplo train stay smashed on the garage steps. Once Calvin was assured that I wasn’t going to try to pick it up again he started yelling, “Go Way Mommy! Go Way!” I explained to him that I was not going to leave him in the garage by himself. If he wanted alone time, he had to go upstairs to his bedroom. He did not like this response and kept telling me to go away.

Calvin’s mood has just recovered as he has discovered the fun of playing in our car. He just discovered the garage door opening. I should probably go rescue the car now . . .

Calvin & Cat5

Down

  • It’s hot. Hot. Hot. Hot. I don’t like hot. I miss the misty Oregon beach :-( (It seems a bit cooler today but still, too hot.)

  • I’m getting increasingly annoyed by all the machinations around the debt ceiling issue. Very unhappy with my representative at the moment.

Ups

  • A got a chance to clean the house for the first time in two weeks. I feel much better now.

  • My tomatoes are starting to ripen. Like last year, I doubt they’ll be able to keep up with Calvin’s appetite but he’s very intrigued by eating tomatoes off a plant. Unfortunately, it’s hard to explain the “no, they’re not red enough” concept.

Calvin Moment

  • I referenced this next anecdote on twitter a couple of weeks ago. However, it’s funny enough that I think it deserves it’s own mention. Calvin usually watches kid DVDs while I make supper. This time, the show had ended and he wanted me to start it at the beginning again. I told him no because it was almost supper time. He insisted but I kept declining. Finally, he became so upset that he literally stomped up the stairs, opened the baby gate at the top and then closed it, ran into his room and slammed the door. When he heard me coming up the stairs, the baby gate is very squeaky, he poked his head out of his room and yelled, “Go way! mommy! Go way!” while gesturing me frantically away. It was the funniest thing I had seen in a long time. I’m sure his mood wasn’t improved by my helpless peels of laughter. I went back downstairs and waited for him to cool off, which he did fairly quickly, and then he wanted to cuddle.

  • Calvin has started picking his own books. I took Calvin to Pajamara Story Time at the Carbon Valley library last night. Its theme was trains so he was entranced. On the way out, he veered and grabbed a book from the bookshelf and then demanded we read it immediately. Since it feels like sacrilege to deny such a request, I complied. We then checked it out and he’s asked me to read it three times since. There’s a segment in the book where Molly, the protagonist, is being carried away by helium balloons. Each time we come to this section Calvin tries to pinch her friends between his fingers and move them up closer to Molly to help her. I’m not entirely sure what he thinks he’s doing. He does have a sticker book so maybe he thinks he can peel them off the page and put them closer to Molly and everything will be better.

  • This evening Calvin decided he wanted to go on an expedition on the path behind our house. I shrugged and hopped the fence to follow holding the book I was reading. Cat5 decided she wanted to join the walk also. When I was a teenager, I developed the ability to walk and read at the same time. So, 5 and Calvin walked side by side with me following slightly behind with my nose in a book. (5 follows us when we walk better than many dogs I’ve seen.) However, once Calvin got closer to the busy road beside our subdivision, I stopped reading to keep a better eye on the two small mammals. There’s a pretty wide grassy area between the busy road and the first houses in the subdivision so I let Calvin run around in circles giggling to himself. All was well until, for some reason, both Calvin and 5 headed straight for the busy street with the fun vehicles. I shoved the book under my arm, scooped up 5 with one arm and Calvin with the other and firmly started walking back toward the walking path. Neither mammal was pleased by my interruption of their run and protested loudly. Eventually, once I felt we were a safe(ish) distance away, I set them back down. I told Calvin that we needed to find “daddy” at which point we started our journey back home. However, it was a very long meandering one, very like the story of the Israelites in the dessert. I’d suggest going one way and 5 and Calvin would protest and run squealing in the exact opposite direction. (Well, Calvin ran squealing, 5 just followed Calvin.) Then I’d catch up and Calvin would reverse direction and run circles around me before falling down in the grass. It was exhausting but Calvin seemed to have a lot of fun.

Long Weekend

Down

  • Calvin is still pretty clingy. Fortunately, he isn’t crying as much when I drop him off at daycare. However, right at 5:30 for the last couple of nights he starts clinging to me and refuses to let go. It makes finishing supper prep and eating tricky.

  • I haven’t been exercising as much as I should. Part of this is due to my sleep getting disrupted in various ways. First, Calvin vomited in the middle of the night last week and then fireworks started going off culminating on Monday night. The last couple of nights I have slept reasonably and so have been able to get up and exercise.

Ups

  • On Sunday we went up to Rocky Mountain National Park and went hiking. Because of the crowds, we parked in Estes Park and took the shuttle bus to the main parking lot and then another one to our trail head. This ate up a fair amount of time. However, for Calvin this was the highlight of the experience. He did appear to enjoy hiking but he was really excited about the bus rides.

  • I’m so glad libraries exist. It’s been miserably hot outside so instead of playing outside, Calvin and I have been visiting libraries. Longmont has a train set in the children’s room that Calvin particularly enjoys.

Calvin Moment

  • Calvin is starting to count. I don’t think he really understands the concept yet though. For instance, tonight we were reading Finicky Felicia in a cat poem book. There’s a picture of 4 birds on the page so I suggested he counted them. He pointed at the first one and counted “one,” the second one “two”, the third one “three,” and then for the fourth one he pointed and said, “four, five six!”

Simplification

  • I cleaned out my pants drawer and put all the pants that no longer fit or look ghastly in the thrift store box.

He’s Playing with Duplos!

Down

  • I’ve been kind of off the latter part of this week, not sure why. Maybe it’s just the heat.

  • Calvin’s been pretty clingy lately. The last couple of days he clung and cried excessively both when I leave him at daycare and when Jaeger takes him for bedtime stories. It’s very exhausting.

Ups

  • I managed to exercise several days this week. I’m not up to my normal routine yet but it’s gotten better.

  • I just finished reading Just Like Heaven, by Julia Quinn, which I enjoyed. Quinn is one of my favorite historical romance authors.

Calvin Moment

  • This week whenever someone asks me how Calvin’s doing I proudly announce, “He’s playing with duplos!” Prior to Tuesday, most of the time Calvin tried to play with duplos he was constantly asking for help in putting them together and taking them apart. This was particularly bad because Calvin’s artistic vision never match Jaeger’s or mine so he’d get really upset when we did things wrong. However, on Tuesday he appears to have figured out how to put them together all by himself. He spent literally hours making “trains” (which in this case are just towers that are next to each other). It was fantastic. I think it’s the first time I’ve been able to make dinner without him crying for him for me to pick him up the entire time or him sitting in front of the TV. The rest of the week didn’t turn out quite as well. However, I’m relieved that he now has the potential to amuse himself for significant periods of time.

Simplification

  • I spent a lot of time earlier in the week cleaning up the basement. It’s a never-ending job but I did manage to pack 4 boxes for the thrift store. I decided that there wasn’t any point in keeping my maternity clothes and I also packed up all the old toys and books that I didn’t think were worth passing on to any of our friends or family that might have children.

Airport Day

I got up late yesterday and so only got an abbreviated amount of exercise. After exercising, I started breakfast. I convince myself to eat oatmeal 5 days a week by promising myself something different on the weekend. Recently, I’ve been making Challah Friday and then using the bread for French Toast the next day. Slathered with peanut butter and syrup, it’s hearty enough to keep me filled up most of the day (since my lunches on Sabbath are often sparse) but still is a treat. However, I had forgotten to make bread on Friday. So, I made Whole Wheat Waffles instead. It’s still decadent but I don’t think they fill me up quite as well as the French Toast does.

Yesterday was my day to play for Cradle Roll. So far, playing has been going really well. I was worried yesterday because Calvin spent the entire morning clinging to me. However, it turns out that I can still play even if Calvin is wrapped around me as long as he keeps him arms under my arms. About halfway through the program he loosened up and starting participating more.

After Sabbath School we left church for the Boulder Airport. They were having Airport Day. When Jaeger told me about it, I wasn’t originally sure what it involved. However, since it involved airplanes I decided we probably had to go. Calvin loved it. They had quite a few smaller airplanes on display as well as some old military airplanes. In addition, there was an air force helicopter and even a firetruck. Calvin got to sit in a glider, a firetruck, and the air force helicopter. For those who wanted to pay for it, there were helicopter and bi-plane rides. Calvin had a lot of fun watching the helicopter land and take off. I think he would have stayed there all day if I had let him. It made such as impression that at bedtime he told Jaeger all about his experiences. This is the first time we know of him explicitly relating something from memory.

I had praise practice later in the day so after the airport I packed Calvin up in the car and headed down to Westminster. I started drie1ving several hours early but I was hoping Calvin would nap on the way, which he did. I found a nearby side-street with lots of shade close to the house we were going to practice at. I sat in the car and read for a couple of hours while Calvin napped. Since we were in the shade it was pleasantly warm instead of oppressively hot.

Praise practice went well and we got home at a reasonable time for supper. I had made Mutter Paneer the day before so except for the rice it was just a matter of heating it all up. Sometimes Saturday can be very stressful so it was nice to have a busy Sabbath that still didn’t feel overwhelming.

Park Visit

Down

  • I started feeling sick Monday evening. Took Calvin to daycare Tuesday, told them he was going to be there the whole day, and went back to bed. Tried to work a couple hours but I was too tired so went back to bed. I woke up at 5pm to pick Calvin up but when I stood up, I threw up. Called Jaeger and asked him to pick up Calvin and deal with Calvin’s evening needs.

  • While I was only really sick on Tuesday, I’ve been really tired all week. As a result, I’ve been sleeping in and only exercised one day this week :-(

Ups

  • Started listening to Paladin of Souls by Bujold. I’ve listened to it before but it’s a very good book and I’m once again mesmerized.

  • I’m on the potluck team for this week. In my case, the sole thing I do is make food (normally I’d also help with setup and cleanup but I’m excused since I have Calvin to look after). Usually this means that I’m making something late into the evening the night before. However, this week I managed to split my cooking into two days and finished by supper time. This week I’m taking a Stacked Vegetable Enchilada casserole, South Indian style Peas and Carrots, and Persian Almond Cookies.

Calvin Moment

  • It’s been rainy for the last couple of days so, even if I had felt good enough, I haven’t taken Calvin outside much recently. However, today was a bright and sunny day so I took him to the park. It’s the park that inspired my fear in this post. However, today he didn’t try to climb up the biggest slide by himself so it wasn’t nearly as nerve wracking. Below is a picture of the playground.

  • Calvin enjoys “helping” me in the kitchen. Usually this means anything I do takes twice as long but I’m trying to make the best of it and explain kitchen science to him. Yesterday he helped me make cookies by adding some of the ingredients like baking soda and vanilla. In hindsight, I should have made the cookies after supper. Calvin was so excited by the cookies that he refused to eat the healthier part of his meal. Finally, I got him hooked on eating strawberries instead. I had bought a 2 lb container of strawberries and I believe he ate 3/4-1 lb by himself. I didn’t realize his stomach could fit that much food.

  • I took Calvin to story time at the library last night. This is the first time we’ve tried bedtime story time at our local library (versus the one I work at). Unfortunately, it was the last one until the end of summer. Technically, it’s aimed for kids 3-6 but I decided to take Calvin and just pop out early if it didn’t catch his attention. However, he was enraptured the entire time. At the end, the librarian asked me how old he was and I told her 2. She told me it was obvious I read to him a lot because he was so well behaved (yes, this is more of a “proud parent moment” than a Calvin moment :-) ).

Simplification

  • I took a box of clothing Calvin no longer needs to our local used children’s clothing store. I’ve bought a fair amount of clothing there but never tried to sell any. I got about $10 for the box so we probably would have come out ahead if I had donated it and taken a tax deduction instead. However, it still was enough to pay for a used board book, Duplo set, and firetruck. Calvin loves both the duplo box and the firetruck and insists they sleep with him in his bed.

Book Sale

Down

  • I’ve been eating too much recently. Not sure why. Just always seem hungry. I probably should increase my breakfast and lunch calories.

Ups

  • I got a couple more Indian cookbooks as well as a Persian cookbook that have been fun to peruse. I also finished reading Cryoburn by Bujold which was a great deal of fun. For audio books I’ve been in a bit of a slump. I started listening to a Nora Robert’s book but they never seem to grab me. So, I decided to relisten to Naked in Death by J.D. Robb (who happens to be Nora Roberts but I still like Robb’s books. I can’t explain it). I haven’t finished the In Death series yet but I thought it would be good to go back for a refresher on how it all started. The great thing about my memory is it’s bad enough I can just wait a couple of years and can enjoy the book all over again for the first time.

  • The 16th set of Midsomer Murders arrived at the library for me early in the week and I finished watching it on Friday. It’s a British mystery series so the set consists of 4 1 1/2 hr episodes. It’s not for everyone but I like the British sense of humor and it’s not as gratuitously gory as American mysteries often are.

  • The Friends of Longmont Library had their annual book sale this week. A couple of years ago, before Calvin was born, I was a member of the friends and got a chance to go to the “preview” book sale. Friends got first chance to buy the used books. It was insane, kind of like Black Friday. There were people everywhere and once the book sale was officially open, a wave of people descended on the books. This year I didn’t go until the sale was open to the general public. There were still a lot of people and it was very awkward flipping through books while carrying Calvin on my hip but it was much less scary than the last time I went. We also got quite a few truck, train, and Curious George books as well as a couple of piano books with children’s songs in them. Most of the books cost $0.50 so I could buy books and not feel bad if Calvin ruined them. I would have liked to spend longer sorting through the books but Calvin was restless. There’s always next year.

Calvin Moment

  • Calvin is once again refusing to nap. He skipped a nap two days at daycare last week and then didn’t want to nap over the weekend either. I walked for 1 1/2 hrs yesterday but he insisted on staying perky. Of course, it could have been because it was a little cold outside and he refused to let me wrap him in a blanket. Then, half way back to the car, he took off his socks and shoes and I didn’t notice for several minutes. He objected when I told him we had to put the shoes back on but I told him it was either the shoes or the blanket. He stayed wide awake on the 1/2 hr ride back home until we were turning into our subdivision at which point he slept. So, I had Jaeger bring a book out for me to read in the car while he napped for an hour.

  • I started making supper a little before 5 this evening which apparently wasn’t fast enough for Calvin. He climbed into his high chair before it was time. I popped him out and he climbed back in again. Finally, we gave up and just took a video of him doing it for posterity. He’s a very determined boy.

Simplification

  • I cleaned out Calvin’s closet again and organized the stuff he’ll no longer need into boxes. The closet looks much better. Of course, this just moves the “Calvin stuff” down to the basement instead of actually getting it out of the house. I have this idea that we should keep baby stuff around until we can give it to someone. However, I’m not sure we want to wait until our friends or relatives start having babies. Some stuff is easy to store but the changing table has got to go . . . somewhere.

Freedom, Common Sense, and Safety

Down

  • Calvin slept in today and, perhaps as a result, skipped his afternoon nap. This meant he was incredibly cranky and clingy by 5. We (tried to) eat around 6. Calvin picked at a bit of his food before announcing he needed to use the potty. He did use the potty but didn’t want to get back in his chair. However, one of our rules is that you don’t have to eat but you have to sit at the table when everyone else is eating supper. So, I sat him back in his high chair. He complained a little bit but then asked for his milk. I gave him his milk and he put it in his burrito bowl. I was starting to tell him that milk was for drinking, not playing, when he exclaimed, “no milk!” and threw his cup across the table. The bulk of the milk narrowly missed our computers. I picked Calvin up and put him in his room for a 2 min time-out. Calvin screamed the entire time and I thought he threw up but after the two minutes I went in and didn’t see any evidence of it. I hugged him and explained that we don’t throw things when we’re upset. However, we decided that he probably needed to go to bed early so Jaeger finished eating while I held Calvin. Then Jaeger put Calvin to bed while I finished eating.

Ups

  • We had several days of very good weather last week. On Thursday we were in at the park for almost 2 hrs and I just laid in the sun while Calvin burbled around the park.

  • We had a family outing to the plane museum yesterday. That excursion went really well. Calvin especially enjoyed riding around in little plane tricycles they had.

  • I have officially resigned from the PA committee at church. I tried to do it back in fall but couldn’t find anyone to take my place. However, it’s almost nominating time again and I’ve told the PA leader that I do not intend to continue next year. On one hand, I feel pretty guilty because there aren’t enough people as it is. However, I feel that me spending time on Sabbath morning dealing with the MediaShout script isn’t good for Calvin. It was only once a month but I also play the piano once a month which requires someone else to look after him. So, for now, I think I have a bigger responsibility to Calvin than I do to PA.

Calvin Moment

As Calvin gets older I’m increasingly conflicted over how much I should weigh safety risks when I let him do things. I’ve read books such as Free-range Kids, by Skenazy, and The Blessing of a Skinned Knee, by Mogel, and agree that we have a tendency to be over-obsessed with controlling every aspect of our children’s lives. However, it’s harder for me to restrain my compulsive tendencies. I keep thinking in the back of my head, “well sure, it’s unlikely that $x is going to hurt him but can I live with myself if it does?”

When the AAP changed their policy to officially state that children should ride rear-facing until two I started panicking and wondered if I should turn Calvin back to rear-facing. I specifically got a massive car seat so he could stay rear-facing for longer than standard, which was one-year at the time, but had turned him around at 21 months. After seeing the policy update, I wondered if I should turn him back to rear-facing until he reached the weight/height limit max for rear-facing. I talked to our pediatrician at our last well-baby visit and he basically told me that our society obsesses too much with safety. He pointed out that everyone would be safer in a rear-facing seat but we don’t expect adults to ride that way. Then he told me that since Calvin was two it was fine that I have him in a forward-facing seat. This is why our pediatrician is a good fit for me. He balances my more extreme tendencies with common sense.

Friday we went to a nearby playground. This playground has several different level. The first is around waist-high for me, the 2nd is just barely over my head, and then the final level is significantly higher than I can reach. We got to the playground and Calvin enthusiastically scrambled up the first level and gleefully slid down the little slide. I didn’t panic at all as he’d have to fall at a very odd angle to hurt himself at that height. Then he moved up to the middle tier. This had me a little more nervous as there was a opening on one side, opposite the slide, that he theoretically could fall from. I quickly walked over to that opening to be in place in case I had to catch him. Then Calvin started climbing up to the third level. This is the point when I started to feel panic bubble up. While the third level is high, it is enclosed with a fence taller than Calvin and also designed so he wouldn’t have any footholds to try to climb up the fence (at least at his age). In addition, the slide at the very top is a tunnel so the worst that is likely to happen if he slid down it was either get stuck or come down head first. The most dangerous area really is while he climbs the stairs to the very top level. They are fairly steep and if he fell backwards it could be pretty dangerous. Except . . . Calvin has been climbing stairs for quite a while now. I couldn’t figure out if I should be at the top of the slide to make sure he didn’t fall from the stairs or at the bottom of the slide to catch him if he came down too fast. I was listening to a babble of voices in my head. On one side I heard Skenazy and my mom. On the other, I heard child protective services. Amid all this babble in my head one of the older children at the playground asked, “is he allowed to go down that tall slide?” I replied, “I don’t know.” At which point the boy looked at me dubiously no doubt wondering why the child’s mother hadn’t given me more explicit instructions. It turned out not to be a big issue. Calvin did scramble up to the very top but decided he didn’t want to go down the slide after all so he carefully backed down the stairs again to a level I was more comfortable with.

Later on, Calvin started trying to climb the smaller arched ladder on the first level. I was a little dubious about this as I figured he could fall through the rungs and whack his head, or possibly wind pipe, on the way down. However, it only went to my waist level so was very easy for me to hold my hands in a position where I could grab him if he started slipping. Then, Calvin decided he wanted to climb the arched ladder on the 2nd level. This level goes just above my head so I would be in a significantly worst position to catch Calvin if he fell. The biggest challenge was the step from the last rung to the main playground equipment. In order to transition, Calvin had to carefully grab the surrounding fence bars and then do a mini-jump from the rung to the 2nd level. He did it 3 times. Each time I waited under him with bated breath hoping that I would be able to catch him if he fell. He never did. However, I’m still not sure if I should have been letting him do that or not.

Anyway, I’m still working on figuring out the difference between a reasonable safety rule and an excessive safety rule that will negatively impact his confidence and athletic skill. I suspect this isn’t something I’m going to solve anytime soon *sigh*.